OK, it has come to my knowledge that we have senior citizens visiting my web page. How hard can it be? So it's not very easy for them to see the blue coloured links to the next page. So
Jiffy (also jiff)

noun [in SING.] informal a moment: we'll be back in a jiffy.

ORIGIN late 18th cent.: of unknown origin.

So as you understand, in a jiff pretty much depends on your internet.
I put a “Next” button here and I hope that there isn't any problem to understand how to use that one.
So just CLICK the “Next” button on your left hand side and you will be on the next page in a jiff!

Marunong ka mag-tagalog? Walang problema! Magpunta sa kabilang pahina pindutin ang “NEXT” button sa itaas

Faites vous parlez le français? Pas de problème! Pour arriver à la page suivante faites s'il vous plaît un déclic le bouton “Next” ci-dessus!

Haga usted dice el español? No hay problema! Ver la siguiente página sólo hacer clic el botón “Next” encima!

Farla parla l'italiano? Non problemi! Per vedere la prossima pagina lo scatto per favore giusto Il bottone “Next” sopra

Sprechen sie Deutsch! Kein problem! Wenn Sie die folgende Seite sehen wollen gerade klicken der Knopf “Next” oben!

คุณพูดภาษาไทยได้ไหม ไม่มีปัญหา ถ้าคุณต้องการไปหน้าถัดไป ให้กดปุ่ม “Next” ข้างบนนี้

Вы говорите по-русски? NJET PROBLEMA! Просто нажмите синюю кнопку "Next" с левой стороны и Вы моментально переместитесь на следующую страницу!

E ni Svenskar och inte förstår Engelska så ska ni skämmas. J och Björn, med det menar jag inte att alla mina stavfel ska ältas varje gång vi träffas.

Flag of Skåne / Skånska flagganWell, the flag of Skåne, just a BONUS flag.

Vientiane, Laos - March 2011

Thursday 24 th of March 2011 and I arrived to the airport around 5 o'clock. We were running in to
Laos

Lao: ສາທາລະນະລັດ ປະຊາທິປະໄຕ ປະຊາຊົນລາວ Sathalanalat Paxathipatai Paxaxon Lao, officially the Lao People's Democratic Republic, is a landlocked country in Southeast Asia, bordered by Burma and People's Republic of China to the northwest, Vietnam to the east, Cambodia to the south and Thailand to the west. Its population was estimated to be 6.8 million in 2009.

Laos traces its history to the Kingdom which existed from the 14th to the 18th century. In 1893, it became a French protectorate, with the three kingdoms, Kingdom of Luang Phrabang, Kingdom of Laos and Kingdom of Champasak, uniting to form what is now known as Laos. It briefly gained independence in 1945 after Japanese occupation, but returned to French rule until it was granted autonomy in 1949. Laos became independent in 1954, with a constitutional monarchy under Sisavang Vong. Shortly after independence, a long civil war ended the monarchy, when the Communist Pathet Lao movement came to power in 1975.

Laos is a socialist republic. The capital and largest city is Vientiane. The official language is Lao. Most people are Lao with a significant proportion of indigenous religion as well. It is a rising power in electricity to neighbouring countries such as Thailand, China and Vietnam and the economy is accelerating rapidly with the demands of its metals. It is a member of the Association of Southeast Asian Nations (ASEAN), East Asia Summit and La Francophonie.

From www.wikipedia.org
some traffic at Sukhumvit and the driver asked me what time my flight was leaving.
- 7 o'clock!
- OK, no problem.

As I have no intentions to visit the Thai Embassy in Laos I changed my ticket to come back home earlier. My ticket is booked for Monday night, but I want to be back Saturday evening. This was no problem and they handed me my new ticket at Lao Aviation.

Good, I didn't bring my Rohypnol tablets. I can sleep as long as I want, no need to order any wake up calls. I could pay the overstay, but I have paid my hotel and I also paid for the plane ticket and as I could not imagine me getting any refundAladdin's adventure in Vientiane, LaosI left for Laos. I will leave Saturday losing a few days thatAladdin's adventure in Vientiane, LaosI paid for, but who cares?

I was hungry and the problem with being on a diet is that when you're away from home there is no diet food. Well, we remember me eating tuna at my hotel in Manila. Yes, living at a hotel for a month and you canAladdin's adventure in Manilaarrange your eating arrangements. But this is very hard at an airport and as I had not been eating since early morning I was hungry.Aladdin's adventure in Vientiane, LaosI found a place that looked Japanese and I ordered salmon and avocado sushi.

I had two Tiger beer, well, as you can guess they didn't have any San Miguel Light. But Tiger beer is OK with ice.

While sitting at the Japanese/ Halal place. Yes, some fusion/compo airport restaurant. With only me drinking beer withAladdin's adventure in Vientiane, Laosall the Arabs enjoying the Halal food. Ok, I felt sorry for the girls eating with their face covered with the Burka, or whatever they call it.

Well, I discovered an ad for Tiger Light on the other side of theAladdin's adventure in Vientiane, Laosrestaurant while I was enjoying my sushi and beer. So of course, I changed place as soon as I had finished my sushi and Tiger Light, well, the best beerAladdin's adventure in Vientiane, Laosafter San Miguel Light.

I had a few beers with mu iPod on full blast. Suddenly I had 3 girls in front of me with a sign.Aladdin's adventure in Vientiane, LaosYes the girls recognised me from the check in and I was the passenger they were waiting for. So I paid for my beers and we took off towards the gate. Escorted by three girls and I felt like 20 again. Yes, back when I was 20 they always had to come get me in the airport bar. Hell, I have even joined my flight via the luggage conveyor belt.

OK, anyway, I was escorted by the girls to my gate and I got on the bus to my flight. Coming onboard the bus and the people looked at me like I was the grim reaper. Never mind, I was tipsy and in a good mood,
Aladdin's adventure in Vientiane, Laos

It must have been the smallest airplane I have ever been on, the Lao Aviation from Bangkok toAladdin's adventure in Vientiane, LaosVientiane. I don't like heights and I don't like flying so coming onboard this very small aircraft didn't made me feel much better.

And for sure, looking out the window didn't make me feel better. The ground staff lined up waving at us.
- What theis this??!!

Are they waving farewell to our last mission? I never seenAladdin's adventure in Vientiane, Laosthis before, and I can say that I had have many flights in my life. And I have also seen many flights departing from airports, but never any of the ground staff waving farewell. And for sure, notAladdin's adventure in Vientiane, Laoslined up like this.Where theare we going? OK, I was a wee bit tipsy so I felt like a million even if I was scared and it didn't took long before I had a fresh beer in front of me. Beer Lao, first time for me and I had not expected much.

The beer Lao was quite OK. Of course, I was a wee bit tipsyAladdin's adventure in Vientiane, Laosso I could even have managed to drink a beer Singh.

But the waving GOOD BYE, I was scared the whole flight. What the hell does the waving mean? AfterAladdin's adventure on Singapore Airlinesa few beers and I had to go to the dunny.

The loo was smaller than the loo on the bus to Koh Moi a few years back. I had to enter the loo on my knees and taking a piss was not very easy. I discovered the “Call theAladdin's adventure in Vientiane, LaosStewardess” button and I was reminded when I was flying toilet class to Singapore a few years back. Well,hmm, thinking of it, by now it is quite a few years ago.

Sitting at the toilet with the music on full blast pushing the button when I wanted beer. For sure, this would not have worked today. The Stewardess came knocking on the door and when I opened she handed me a beer. What did the other passenger think?

I had time for two Beer Lao on the flight. The Stewardess came to pick up my beer can, but I was allowed to keep my glass so I could enjoy me beer all the way. I was about to write “all the way to the gate” but we had to walk to the gate. Doing it like back in the days.
Aladdin's adventure in Vientiane, Laos

Aladdin's adventure in Vientiane, Laos
Aladdin's adventure in Vientiane, Laos
Yes, the old style walking to the gate and what a start I had on my trip. Old style, it was likeAladdin's adventure in Vientiane, Laosback in the days when they had to come get me at the airport bar. Happened all the time back in the days. I had to apply for a VISA and the Immigration guy asked how long I was going to stay. I don't know, the original plan was to stay until Monday, but I changed my ticket to go back on Saturday when I checked in at Bangkok International.

And who knows? Maybe I change the ticket again. If I don't like it here I can go back home tomorrow.

I told the immigration that I would stay for a few days. I had to pay 30 something US for my visa and I went through the immigration. I picked up my weekendAladdin's adventure in Vientiane, Laosbag and I went to look for mydriver.

He was waiting for me outside and he grabbed my weekend bag and started to walk towards the car. Well, I wanted a few beers.
- Hold it! I'm going to buy a few beers for the ride
I bought two cans of Heineken. Yes, they didn't have San Miguel Light. I had some of the local currency from the tax free.

I gave them 1000 Baht for cigarettes and I got my change in the local currency. 2 beer and they told me that it was 40 Scooby dollars. I gave them my smallest bill, a 1000 Scooby dollar bill.
- Not 40, 40000!! They told me when I handed them my bill.
I was not surprised, 40 Scooby dollars would have been very cheap.

We had my taxi CD on full blast and I was enjoying my beers in the back. My driver asked if heAladdin's adventure in Vientiane, Laoscould copy my CD.
- I can give it to you when I'm going home, I said.
If I haven't lost the CD by then, nothing is for sure. Well, we passed two girls on our way to town. I recognised one of the girls. She is from Denmark and she was in front of me at the immigration. When I saw her it was like:
- What the? Are they walking in to town?
We stopped and I asked if they wanted a ride to town. And yes, I spoke Danish with them and the understood f@ck all what I was saying. But I feel embarrassed speaking English with people from Denmark so I continued in my home made Danish. Well, I had to change to English.

The girl had arrived from Bangkok and her friend was at the airport to pick her up. Well, imagine the surprise when someone picks you up at the airport and you have to walk in to town. At least you expect a taxi, not to walk.
I asked them were they come from.
- Aarhus
Huvudstaden før bonnerøver I said asking if they know Østkyst Hustlers. Yes, they knew Østkyst Hustlers. We dropped the girls at their guesthouse and we continued to my hotel.
Aladdin's adventure in Vientiane, Laos

Aladdin's adventure in Vientiane, Laos
I got my room on the 5th floor, next to the restaurant and I started by ordering a Tiger beer. IAladdin's adventure in Vientiane, Laoshad another beer and I think I had a third one. Big bottles so I was tipsy and I ended up on a table with a couple. At least I thought it was a couple. But it was a brother and hisAladdin's adventure in Vientiane, Laosyounger sister. The brother was obviously in love with the waiter. The waiter was sitting at the table drinking wine. They asked me if I wanted to get married with the sister. She was looking for a boy friend.

I don't know, they had had 2 or 3 bottles of wine and theyAladdin's adventure in Vientiane, Laoswere obviously drunk because I have a hard time imagine any sober girl that would be interested in marrying me.
Especially not a good looking girl like this.

They were eating salmon and I felt peckish when IAladdin's adventure in Vientiane, Laossaw the serving dish full of salmon. And the salmon was obviously the main attraction at the restaurant because they came with salmon from the kitchen all the time and I ordered a salmon. And I was disappointed, the salmon was frozen and it was like chewing on ice cubes.

The sister and his brother were on the way to the disco atAladdin's adventure in Vientiane, LaosNovotel. But they were closing at midnight and it was around 11 o'clock so I told them that I might meet them there. Well, it was almost midnight when I left the hotel andAladdin's adventure in Vientiane, LaosI took a tuk tuk to town, Novotel was closed when I arrived so we took off towards Don Chan Palace. Don Chan Palace Hotel on the river side and there was a disco.

There was not much people when I arrived to the place.Aladdin's adventure in Vientiane, Laos10 people tops, but they told me that it used to be crowded around 1 or 2 o'clock. They had Beer Lao and Carlsberg so I ordered a Carlsberg.

Carlsberg was OK when drinking from a wine glass with ice. And I had quiteAladdin's adventure in Vientiane, Laosa few beers and after an hour the place was crowded.
3 or 4 o'clock and I left the place. I was tired and I took a tuk tuk back to my hotel. I was looking for a 7 Eleven and luckily enough there was not any 7 Eleven or any other 24 Seven convenient store so I could not buy my hangover milk. It was very good for my diet, 4 bottles of choco milk would have meant millions of calories.

+++++++++++++++
Friday 25 th of March 2011
and I woke up around 12 o'clock. I had a shower and I was surprisedAladdin's adventure in Vientiane, Laoswhen I got hot water. It was really hot, after reading the sign on the doorAladdin's adventure in Nepalto the bathroom I expected it to be like in Nepal when I was trekking Himalaya.

Hot water, solar heated water meant a bucket of water on top of the “Hot shower room” that had been heated by the sunshine and I had expected lukewarm water at best.

I can't say that I felt like a million coming out from the shower. But the hangover had not kicked in so it was not too bad. And checking my valet made me feel better. I had spent 4000 Baht, and 1500 was spent drinking beer and eating sushi on Bangkok International. So it was very cheap in Laos. I'm ordering a beer, handing the bartender 1000 Baht and I'm getting a beer and 1000 Baht in change.
Aladdin's adventure in Vientiane, Laos

Aladdin's adventure in Vientiane, Laos
I went to the restaurant for some breakfast. A big pot of tea, omelette and baguette. It was a beautiful morning, well, actually afternoon. I spoke with a guy from Thailand that was on theAladdin's adventure in Vientiane, Laosbalcony smoking.
- I had expected Vientiane to be very hot, he said.
- Yes, it is very nice, I said.
He was in Vientiane working on a project so he was living at my hotel with 2 other Thai people.

Well, I found one thing strange in Laos, the language. And thiswas not because I was drunk, but I could speak Thai with all the Lao people. Even when I was sober and they understood everything I said. They even understood the word “hangover”.

They were laughing, but when I speak Thai with Thai people itAladdin's adventure in Vientiane, Laosis a different story. And so far, I have never managed to say “hangover” to any Thai that understood what I meant. So Laos turned in to be a very nice place.Aladdin's adventure in Vientiane, LaosCheap and I could speak with the people without problem. And it was very nice people and Vientiane is a very nice place.

I left the hotel after my breakfast and I walked up the road until
Masken
Jag kunde inte hitta nåt jävla klock torn som skulle vara så jävla fantastiskt.

OK, jag tittade väl inte så noga. Men jag stoppade för en öl istället.
I reached the main road where I turned right walking down towards the city centre or what I thought was the direction to the city centre. But I guess everything is the city centre in a small city like Vientiane.

Well, how fun is it to walk around town with a hangover starting to kick in? I stopped at a place with an OPEN sign on the door.
Aladdin's adventure in Vientiane, Laos- It is only the wine shop open.
- What time do you open the bar?
- We're open the bar around 6 thirty.

I continued 100 meters down the road to a place called RedAladdin's adventure in Vientiane, LaosMekong, at least I remember it like Red Mekong. I saw the sign, Australian Manager and he spoke English. Well, strange that yoy need to put out that they speak English in Australia.
- Hmm, thinking of it. We have people claiming to be Swedish but they speak f@ck all Swedish.

Beer Lao and Carlsberg were on the menu and I ordered a Carlsberg and a wine glass with ice. And IAladdin's adventure in Vientiane, Laoswas sitting there listening to music drinking my Carlsberg. I was pondering over my hangover. No hangover and I thought that maybe it is my new and healthy lifestyle making me feel so much better. Well, that was until I realised that I was ordering my fourth Carlsberg.

Yes, going straight to TIPSY skipping the hangover seems to be the way to go. I left the place after my fourth Carlsberg. I wanted to buy some Lao snacks for my Trainer's friend at Bangkok Fight Club so I went looking for a shop.
Aladdin's adventure in Vientiane, Laos








I found a shop and I asked the staff for Lao snack. Most of the stuff was from Thailand and this was not what I had in mind. But one of the guys showed me Cat shit, yes, that is what they called the stuff. And I bought a bag of something else, I have no clue what it was.

I left the shop and I walked along Mekong River stopping at different bars for beers. My plan wasAladdin's adventure in Vientiane, Laosto return to my hotel to change clothes and to leave the snacks. I wanted to buy a t-shirt for my Trainer at Bangkok Fight Club. He asked me for a t-shirt from Laos. But I have not managed to find any t-shirts so I will buy thet-shirt in Bangkok. But don't tell him!

I passed a bar with a sign BOOM BOOM BOOMAladdin's adventure in Vientiane, LaosMusic and I entered the place. We were soon having the music on full blast and I had plenty of Beer Laos coming my way. I was starting to get drunkand I had to return to my hotel before it was too late. Too late, I mean before I was too drunk.

I took a tuk tuk back to my hotel. And according to my camera it was 5 o'clock. And I arrived with an sore arse.
The last stretch of road had no pavement and it is full of potholes.
Aladdin's adventure in Vientiane, Laos

Aladdin's adventure in Vientiane, Laos
And the seats in the tuk tuk is not very comfortable so it was not a very nice experience riding theAladdin's adventure in Vientiane, LaosAladdin's adventure in Vientiane, Laostuk tuk on the unpaved roads. And that's even though the tuk tuk only made 20 km/h. Yes, it felt like it would have been quicker to walk.

Well, maybe they have paved the road when I'm back next time. For sure, I will be backand I can recommend Seng Tawan Riverside Hotel in Vientiane in Laos. And there were a lot of constructions going on so I don't think it will take long before the last stretch of road to the hotel will be paved.

Well, I had 2 beers at my hotel before I took a tuk tuk back to the bars. I ended up on a roof top with live music. I was sitting at a table talking with a few girls and guysAladdin's adventure in Vientiane, Laosfrom Laos when I guy passed the table asking me if I was from Sweden.
- How did you know?

Well, turned out that he was from Thailand but he wasAladdin's adventure in Vientiane, Laosworking in Laos. But he had been working in Sweden so he recognised my PRINCE cigarettes.

I missed the door when I went to the bathroom, yes, I had had several beers by now. So I missedAladdin's adventure in Vientiane, Laosthe door and I felt trough the wall to the bathroom. Not very sturdy and I was hoping that the rest of the house was built sturdier or we would fell through the roof.
Aladdin's adventure in Vientiane, Laos
I didn't hang around too long after the wall incident. There were plenty bars along the Mekong River so IAladdin's adventure in Vientiane, Laoshad plenty opportunities to drink beer while working my way up the road along the Mekong River.

I ran in to the Thai guy that I meet in the restaurant while having my breakfast. He was sitting with his colleague drinking beer on the hotel terrace.

I joined them for a Beer Lao and my memory is a wee bitblurred. But I remember that the lady was in my room choosing what shirt I should wear tomorrow.

I don't remember why we spent time discussing shirts. But she chose a red shirt so red shirt it will be

+++++++++++++++
Saturday 26 th of March 2011
and I woke up 20 minutes before 12 o'clock. A shower and I were on the restaurant balcony ordering breakfast at 12 o'clock. Omelette, baguette and a big pot of tea.Aladdin's adventure in Vientiane, LaosI got a baguette with something that looked like a coil of manila rope. Not so nice as you understand.
- What theis this?

I had to scratch of the, well, whatever it was before I could eat the baguette. I brought a big bottle of Tiger with a wine glass and ice to my room when I was ready with my breakfast. Yes, I have no plans to fly back to Bangkok with a hangover.

I had two big bottles before I checked out at 3 o'clock. I had a can of Beer Lao in the van on the way to the airport so I felt pretty good when we arrived to the airport. Check in and immigrationAladdin's adventure in Vientiane, Laostook a few minutes and I were soon standing in the bar with a Beer Lao in front of me.

Vientiane International is a very small airport. One bar, a smoke room, souvenir shop and a tax free shop. But it is a very nice airport and the staff is very friendly.

The departure hall was like a big living room and it was no problem to drink beer in the tax free shop. I bought vodka, Baileys and candy for our Trainers daughters.

I had time for one more beer before the boarding. We had to walk over the tarmac to the airplane, it was only 100 meters so it was OK.
Aladdin's adventure in Vientiane, Laos

Aladdin's adventure in Vientiane, Laos

Aladdin's adventure in Vientiane, Laos

Aladdin's adventure in Vientiane, Laos
Walking the short distance is better than going by bus. Of course, if it is 5 kilometres to the airAladdin's adventure in Vientiane, Laosplane you prefer a bus. Plenty seats available and I hadAladdin's adventure in Vientiane, Laosasked for the same seat as I had when coming here. 1B and the seat next to me were empty.

And no hangover, disappeared after my second bottle of Tiger so I felt good. I can imagine this flight with a hangover force 9,6. Would have been terrible, but now I was just waiting for the FASTEN SEAT BELT light to go off so I could get a Beer Lao. It was nice to see Vientiane from above in day light.
Aladdin's adventure in Vientiane, Laos

Aladdin's adventure in Vientiane, Laos

Aladdin's adventure in Vientiane, Laos

Aladdin's adventure in Vientiane, Laos
I could see my hotel and the big white building along the Mekong River is the Don Chan Palace HotelAladdin's adventure in Vientiane, Laoswhere I visited the disco on Thursday night. AndAladdin's adventure in Vientiane, LaosVientiane is really a small town, but I really liked it.

As soon as the FASTEN SEAT BELTS light came off I got a Beer Lao.

They were soon bringing me beer #3.
- We are only allowed to serve 3 beers.
OK, never mind, we're approaching FUNKY TOWN and I can buy a beer at the airport.

Aladdin approaching Bangkok/ FUNKY TOWN

Aladdin approaching Bangkok/ FUNKY TOWN

Aladdin at Suvarnabhumi Airport
We arrived to Suvarnabhumi Airport and we had to take a bus to the terminal. OK, arriving to Suvarnabhumi Airport by bus is actually better than arriving to a gate. It is like 100 miles to theAladdin's adventure in Bangkok/ FUNKY TOWNimmigration from the gates and after 5 minutes trotting with the weekend bag and the tax free bags it tends toAladdin's adventure in Bangkok/ FUNKY TOWNget tiresome. But coming with the buss and you enter the terminal smack at the immigration.

There were 3 people in front of me at the immigration soAladdin's adventure in Bangkok/ FUNKY TOWNI was at the AOT desk and a minute later I had a guy taking care of my bags. We stopped to buy 2 cans of beer on the way to the car. A quick fag before getting in tothe car and we were soon on the way to Sukhumvit Soi 23. We were hauling arse downAladdin's adventure in Bangkok/ FUNKY TOWNthe high way and I stepped inside my door less than 1 hour after landing at Suvarnabhumi Airport.

Arriving time 17:50 and my plan was to step inside “To dieAladdin's adventure in Bangkok/ FUNKY TOWNfor” on Thong Lor a wee bit tipsy at 7 o'clock. Well, I didn't made it until 7, it was almost 8 o'clock when I arrived to “To die for” because I was held up at home.

The first thing I heard when I got out of the taxi was:
- ALADDIN! FARANG BANGLAMPOO!!- What the?
- Don't you recognise me?

No I had no clue who the guy on the parking lot was. He told me that he used to work on Hotel 27.
- What the? I haven't been living there for at least 16 years!
Well, I imagine the guy in long hair and I recognised him. He is the guyAladdin's adventure in Bangkok/ FUNKY TOWNwho used to stand up in front of me in my room screaming:
- ALADDIN! SHAPE UP!

Well, the world is small, and for sure, it is nice that they keep on recognising me after 16 years. Obviously I'm still looking young. And as they don't have San Miguel Light atAladdin's adventure in Bangkok/ FUNKY TOWN“To die for” I had to order an Heineken. It is OK with ice so no problem.

I had a few beers before I took a taxi to Whiskey Mist for more beer. From Whiskey Mist I went to a pub next door. The guy in the band recognised me.
- Hey! You were here a few weeks ago.
Embarrassing, did I behave last time around? All the people at the pubwere looking at me. But as I was tipsy it was no problem. But I can imagine if I had been sober. I went to Khaosan Road and I was home, well, I don't know.
But I think they closed 4 or 5 o'clock at Khaosan Road.

+++++++++++++++
Sunday 27 th of March 2011
and DARN! My hangover reached a force 9,6. I was in bed until late afternoon. I made a milkshake and I returned to my hangover DVDs and my bed.
Aladdin suffering from a force 9,6 hangover in Bangkok/ FUNKY TOWN
Well, one thing is for sure. I was glad to wake up in my own bed. Imagine waking up in Vientiane knowing that I had to catch an afternoon flight back home.

My friend called in the afternoon and he asked if I wanted to go for a little something to eat.
Aladdin's adventure in Bangkok/ FUNKY TOWN- Where? SCAN DELI? I asked.
- What about Khlingklao on Soi 22?
- OK, I see you there in one hour

I had a shower and I took my bags of empty and cleaned tuna cans and I left to get a taxi. I could not help but wondering why I clean my tuna cans. And why do I bother sort my garbage, one bag for plastic and one bag for metal. I watched the news before leaving and at first there was something about a Formula 1 race.

Yes, I can't understand how this is allowed. We're killing ourselves and the planet we're living on and theyare speeding around in racing cars spending millions and millions of dollars and I'm passing children without food and any chance for education on a daily basis.

I'm cleaning tuna cans while one race put more strain on our environment than my lifelong consumption of tuna will ever do. But the people on the garbage details are happy, they don't need to dig through the garbage looking for the metal and plastic when they come to buy the garbage.

And Japan, the workers at the nuclear power plant are squelching around in radioactive water. And if theyAladdin's adventure in Bangkok/ FUNKY TOWNare getting it right on the radio they do it without protective clothing. Their rubber boots are getting full of water and if water can get in to your rubber boots the radio activity will for sure do. Who is responsible forAladdin's adventure in Bangkok/ FUNKY TOWNthis? None of the back-up cooling system were working and someone should for sure go to jail for this disaster.

And here I am sorting my garbage while the radioactive water is pouring out in the ocean. Well, as my friend told me:
“Then we will have one of the guys crying in TV telling everyone how sorry he is for the f@ck up before committing hara-kiri and there is no one responsible left in life”

Well, I ordered my usual Chiang Mai curry soup and mango with sticky rice. The Waitress told meAladdin's adventure in Bangkok/ FUNKY TOWNthat I had become very small. When the next Waitress said the
Before
After
same thing I felt very happy. A real boost for my self-confidence.

The food and service was excellent as always and as we're frequent visitors to this restaurant we got 10 % discount. Well, everyone coming to Thailand just complains about how greedy they are, well, I can't say that Thai people are more greedy that anyone else in the world. Oh, how boring it is to listen to the “The Thai smile is never to be seen again” and “It was better back in the days”

And what is there to smile about when a cubic ton of old grumpy bald sex tourist is coming around the corner.
- Ups, isn't this the exact description of our hero!

OK, maybe not the grumpy part, except when he is suffering from an rampant hangover. Well,Aladdin's adventure in Bangkok/ FUNKY TOWNanyway, a cubic ton of old bald and grumpy sex tourist coming around the corner expecting every Thai girl to treat him like God's gift the them.

Well, we were pretty pleased when we walked to Robin Hood. We were surprised to receive the 10% discount and of course, it felt nice to be appreciated. I drank 3 soda waters at Robin Hood before I ordered one Tiger Light.

One beer was enough for me and when we finished ourbeers we walked down to the Japanese restaurant on Soi 33/1. Salmon & avocado sushi and water for dinner. Well, I had a curry as well. And I did not walk back home as I was in a hurry back home to my bed to attend to my hangover. I watched 3 movies before I felt asleep.

+++++++++++++++
Monday 28 th of March 2011
and I was still suffering from the hangover. I had been drunk for 3 days and that is many years since I was drunk for 3 days last time. I skipped gym and my Thai books and I kept my self busy writing on my web page and at 14 thirty I left to meet my friend atAladdin's adventure in Bangkok/ FUNKY TOWNan Indian restaurant on Sukhumvit Soi 7. Well, I would have preferred to have salmon at SCAN DELI. But my friend wanted to eat Indian food.

And darn, I felt bad when I walked back home from the Indian restaurant. I will never go back to that restaurant, well, at least not in a very long time. I stopped at 7 Elevenand I bought a few diet drinks and I was back home just in time to change clothes before leaving for Bangkok Fight Club.

I was still feeling very bad from the Indian dinner when I came back home from the boxing and I decided to change “Not to go there for a very long time” to “Never again”. I felt like I had a ton of concrete in my stomach so I never bothered stepping up on the scale. And expensive, 1600 Baht for 2 persons. For this money we could have had a cubic ton of salmon at SCAN DELI or we could have had a dinner for 4 persons at Klingklao. And for sure, we would have felt much better.

+++++++++++++++
Tuesday 29 th of March 2011
and I didn't get out of bed until 11 o'clock. My alarm went off at 9,but as I didn't felt a sleep until 3 or 4 o'clock I just turned off the alarm.

Well, one thing is for sure, it is time for me to work. They want me to go to Korea for 12 month as an Inspector on a Chemical Tanker they are building at one of the Korean shipyards. But I'm leaving for another tankerhopefully at the end of this week. Yes, it is really time for me toleave FUNKY TOWN. I can't get out of bed, and I have not made my bed for severaldays. My Thai books are in my drawer and I have not opened them for several days. Thai school, I have not been to my Thai school for a long
Masken
Som vanligt när man skämmt ut sig under weekenden så fick man köra med Pelle Plutt tricket och börja en ny Thai boxnings skola.
time. So I'm getting lazy and it is really hard to shape up once I have started to loll around in bed all day long. But I'm going to the boxing every day, but that is mostly thanks to the success with my diet. Andhmm, all the girls that starts toAladdin's adventure in Bangkok/ FUNKY TOWNsmile at me on the streets and in the shops helps getting my arse to the boxing club.

Yes, Bangkok Fight Club, I decided to skip the training today and I felt bad about it. But our dinner at Khingklao saved me. Yes, walking from Khingklao to Robin Hood last Sunday afternoon and I was walking a dangerous path.
>>>>
Yes, hangover, and I really felt bad. But if I had started to drink beer with my friend it would have been worse waking up on Monday morning with a rampant hangover. But I was drinking soda water and the whole thing turned out quite well. How?
>>>
We passed Chakrit Muay Thai School on the way to Robin Hood. It was closed because it was Sunday so I could not check out the place. But I decided to go check it out today as I had cancelled todays session at Bangkok Fight Club.
Aladdin's adventure at Chakrit Muay Thai School in Bangkok/ FUNKY TOWN
I walked down to the fight club and they were open today. I entered the fight club and there wereAladdin's adventure at Chakrit Muay Thai School in Bangkok/ FUNKY TOWNa very beautiful girl training with one of the Trainers. There was one other guy training as well.

I really liked what Isaw, and I don't mean the girl.

There were 4 Trainers and not much people around. And I liked the place, plenty equipment and therewas even a boxing ring.

The reason for me to look for a new place is that there were so much people at Bangkok Fight Club yesterday. More than half of the place is for people training jiu jitsu. And yesterday there was aAladdin's adventure at Chakrit Muay Thai School in Bangkok/ FUNKY TOWNnew guy from Japan, 16 years old and his family was there to watch.

There were 4 Thai guys watching us. They wanted to start training Thai boxing. So there was not really much space left at Bangkok Fight Club.

OK, I don't think the 4 Thai guys will show up. Yesterday they told me that it looked very hard to train Thai boxing.

So maybe it will turn out like back in the days atHelsingborgs Boxnings Klubb. Rocky came to the cinema and the boxing club was brimmed with people that wanted to become the next Rocky. After 2 days they realised that it would take a lot of work and they never came back.Hopefully it will be the same here because it impossible to be there with all these people hanging around.

Well, anyway, I spoke with the trainers and it was just to start. So I walked back home and I gotAladdin's adventure at Chakrit Muay Thai School in Bangkok/ FUNKY TOWNchanged and I was back an hour later. And DARN! I almost got a cardiac arrest. The owner sparred with me and I was half dead when we were ready.

Chakrit Muay Thai School is more expensive than Bangkok Fight Club, well, if you count the time you get attention it is cheaper per hour. Drop in is 800 Baht and it is 500 Baht at Bangkok Fight Club. But at Chakrit Muay Thai School you have a, well, almost like a personal trainer for 2 hours. 15 times at Chakrit Muay Thai School is 6000 Baht and 5 days per week is 4500 Baht at Bangkok Fight Club

But I have a plan, I will attend both clubs. Tomorrow I will attend Chakrit Muay Thai School in the afternoon and I will go to Bangkok Fight Club tomorrow night. I will have to go to the airport tomorrow night so no walking back home from Bangkok Fight Club, it will be taxi.

Yes, I will fly to Belfast via London with Qantas airlines Thursday morning at 00:45. So I will justAladdin's adventure in Bangkok/ FUNKY TOWNhave time to go home and take a shower before leaving for the airport.

Back home from Chakrit Muay Thai School and I had a shower before I left for Emporium to look for boxing gloves. Before I left for Emporium I threw 13 packs of coffin nails in the garbage.

I was half dead after the training and I decided to give up smoking once and for all. Would be embarrassing to die from a cardiac arrest at the boxing club.

I took a brisk walk to Emporium even though I was sore and my body was aching after the “KICKAladdin's adventure in Bangkok/ FUNKY TOWNARSE” session at Chakrit Muay Thai School during the afternoon. And I was hungry, I have only had 2 cans of tuna during the day.

So when I had been looking for boxing gloves (I never boughtany, they were too small) I went to eat sushi on the 5th or 6th floor. Avocado salad and salmon sushi.

It was excellent and healthy food and when I was ready I went down to the ground floor to have a look for someBvlgari Eau Parfumee au The Rougeperfume. I got a very nice perfume, Bvlgari Eau Parfumee au The Rouge last time I was flying with the Emirates and I went to see if they had Bvlgari Eau Parfumee au The Rouge.

No, they didn't have this perfume as this was the summer collection. Well,LANCÔME MIRACLEmaybe I can find it on the airport tomorrow. Emirates Airlines, well, I still have my LANCÔME MIRACLE from Thai Airways. And when this bottle is finished I have one more bottle that I found on Central Festival in Pattaya last time we were in Pattaya snorkelling.

And while walking around looking for the perfume I passed a girl that was looking for something to buy. I smiled and asked how she was. I saw her later on at LANCÔME's desk and she smiled at me.And when I took the escalator up to the EXIT to the BTS she was behind me.
- Fantasy! Fantasy! She said.
I turned around and she was smiling pointing at my shirt.
- Very colourful!
I increased my speed in hope to lose her. I lost her on the way and I walked back home.

Well, back home from Emporium I had to take a cancer stickfrom my garbage bag. Yes, I will
Before
After
have to bring out the garbage or I might have yet another cigarette.

I started to pack my bag when I finished my coffin nail and just to show how serious I am with my diet I will pack my scale.
Yes, I will bring my scale, they usually have a scale onboard. But I don't want to take the chance that it is a scale for children and I won't be able to use the darn thing.

+++++++++++++++
Wednesday 30 th of March 2011
and I woke up to my last day in FUNKY TOWN, at least the lastAladdin's adventure in Bangkok/ FUNKY TOWNday for a while. I had my last GOOD MORNING tea and TUNA & ONION SURPRISE ® before I left for the bank. Coming out on the street and the street was full of trucks. A wardrobe truck and my first thought was that it was someone buying second hand clothes. But it turned out that they were making a movie.

I was not in a good mood walking to the bank. I had to deposit money, cash, because Ineed the money to be on my account tomorrow. So I had to use my Swedish ATM card. It was too late to transfer money from Sweden to Thailand. I never bothered to make anyBvlgari Eau Parfumee au The Rougetransfer because I was told that the guy owing me the 120 000 Baht for the lost bet would deposit the money on my account.

Well, f@ck his money. By now I'm tired of people making bets they never pay. But I will post the picture of him that we agreed on the first time he lost the bet.

I walked back home from Bangkok Bank and I passed through Robinson. They had the Bvlgari Eau Parfumee au The Rouge so I bought two bottles. Now when I look good is also important to smell good. Coming back home from the bank and I didn't had much time before it was time to leave for Chakrit Muay Thai SchoolAladdin's adventure at Chakrit Muay Thai School in Bangkok/ FUNKY TOWNat Washington Square on Sukhumvit Soi 22.

At Chakrit Muay Thai School it is almost like it was back in the day at Helsingborgs Boxnings Klubb. I started by skipping rope and then we were kicking arse with the punch mitts. We stopped when I had the taste of blood in my mouth and I thought that I was going to get a cardiac arrest. I finished the session with the punch ball.

I left and I told the Trainers thatAladdin's adventure at Chakrit Muay Thai School in Bangkok/ FUNKY TOWNI would see them in 2 or 3 months. I had paid for 15 sessions and I also paid for a pair of boxing gloves. But they only had size 12 and the owner was going to order a pair of sizeAladdin's adventure at Bangkok Fight Club in Bangkok/ FUNKY TOWN7 Eleven in Bangkok18 for me that I will get the next time.

I stopped at my local 7 Eleven on my way home. And the girls were surprised when I came in.
- WOW, you get smaller by the day!

I had prepared everything at home for myAladdin's adventure at Bangkok Fight Club in Bangkok/ FUNKY TOWNdeparture so I decided to have a last session at Bangkok Fight Club before leaving for the airport. And as I was a wee bit late I had to speed walk to Bangkok FightClub. I made it in time and I arrived at the same time as our Trainers friend. I ran in to her at the entrance to Panjit Tower.

The girl selling water at the entrance was not there so I had to go up without water. I prepared myself for the training and it looked like we wereAladdin's adventure at Bangkok Fight Club in Bangkok/ FUNKY TOWNgoing to be a wee bit late so I took the elevator down to the entrance hoping to find the water girl. She was not there and I had to wait a few minutes before she came and I could get my bottle of water.

Back on floor 10 and we could start the training. Luckily enough we were only 3Aladdin's adventure at Bangkok Fight Club in Bangkok/ FUNKY TOWNguys at the place. 3 guys for boxing, there was a few other guys training Jiu Jitsu. A few minutes later the Light Designer arrived and she brought new gloves. Yes, better off having you own, the gloves at the club smells, well, notso good.

Well, I had to leave a few minutes earlier because I had booked a car to pick me up at 21 thirty for transportto the airport. I said good bye and I asked the Light designer for a hug. And of course, looking good and that was no problem. It was a totallyAladdin's adventure in Bangkok/ FUNKY TOWNdifferent story when FLABBY started at Bangkok Fight Club.

And Wednesday the 30th of March 2011 goes down the history books as the first day I return home in a taxi. I was back home quarter to 9 and AOT's car was already at the parking lot with the driver sleeping in the car.
- I will just have a quick shower and we're ready to take off!

I was back at the car quarter past 9 with my bags and we leftAladdin's adventure in Bangkok/ FUNKY TOWNfor the airport 15 minutes earlier than planned. It took us about 30 to 35 minutes to get to Suvarnabhumi Airport. Qantas and I had no expectations of getting my own row. Coming from Australia bound for London with a stopover in Bangkok so the flight would most likely be full.

And I was right,I could not even get a aisle seat. I had to sit at the window. And imagine me climbing over the other people getting out of my seat. No, I'm better off staying put until we're in London.

I went to have sushi at the very same restaurant I ateat when I left for Vientiane. There was a guy sitting there drinking beer. By the look of it he was crazy. Trying to pick up conversations with all the people around him scaring the children.

OK, I hear you saying “Don't play dart while in a rubber raft”. But when I entered the place the staff were all smiling, recognising me from when I was drinking Tiger beer last Thursday. Well, anyway, no one wanted to speak with the guy and he started to talk with me.
- OH NO! I was thinking to myself.
I tried to ignore him.
- Where you come from?
- Norway
- Are you from Norway or did you say No way? He asked in Swedish.
- OH NO! I was thinking to myself again.
- I'm from London
- How long have you been here?
- 2 days, I answered.
- I live here 6 months a year. I live with a beautiful lady boy
- Who cares?

He when he should pay for his beer he asked for the price.
- 160 Baht
- 169 BAHT FOR ONE BEER!!?? VERY EXPENSIVE!!
I was embarrassed and it didn't become better when they came to pick him up in a wheel chair. A lot of strange people at the airport. And the Russians, 4 of them coming straight from the tax free shop. Putting a bottle on the table and they asked for 3 glasses. One of them was not old enough to drink. They poured the glasses full of Whiskey and they emptied the glasses in one gulp chasing it down with water. Yes, they had brought a bottle of water as well.

Well, I left the restaurant and I walked to the gate ready to leave for M/T Ternvik .







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